Pani Poni Dash!

Pani Poni Dash! is a Japanese television series based around the concept of Satire, for it frequently references Japanese culture in a wide array of ways. It centers around several first year students and their teachers in a school in Japan, though the main focus is on class 1-C.

No Linings in Winter, Cotton Linings in Summer

Narrator: Rebecca Miyamoto, born of an American father and a Japanese mother. Graduated from the Massachusetts Institute of technology. The youngest graduate in the school's history. She then returned to Japan to become a high school teacher. However...she was only 10 years old at the time.
Becky Miyamoto: [sighs] This sucks.




Himeko Katagiri: Maho! Oh my God, oh my God, you guys will never believe the news I got! This is some omega big news! [slips, she hits the camera]
Miyako Uehara: What on earth makes you to make so much noise this early, GOD!
Kurumi Momose: You should expect it by now.




Rei Tachibana: Our homeroom teacher Mr. (bleep) quit on us?!




Miyako Uehara: Quiting without giving us any notice. It's irresponsible!
Sayara Suzuki: Do you know if he gave any reason?
Himeko Katagiri: You know, I kinda didn't think to ask that. [Miyako groans]




Ichijo: We should devote ourselves to God.
Kurumi Momose: Do you think she's talking to us?
Rei Tachibana: Don't worry about her, she doesn't know anything.




Old Geezer: Unfortunately, your homeroom teacher, Mr. (no audio) turned in his resignation yesterday and won't be returning to teach you ever again.
Miyako Uehara: But did he give any reason, sir?
Old Geezer:: [no audio, all of the students gasp] But if you want to know the truth...[evil laughter]
Rei Tachibana: [turns to the viewer] So, you ever wonder what the hell's going on behind the scenes of this school?




Old Geezer: Your new teacher's name is Ms. Miyamoto and...[pulls out his bento box]mmm...Im going to have Sakaben for lunch.
Rei Tachibana: We don't care what's in your bento box, old man.




Old Geezer: Here it is, Ms. Rebecca Miyamoto, your new teacher. [pulls out a big picture of her, with a black ribbon around it, making many students think she's dead]
Miyako Uehara: Our teacher's a corpse?!
Rei Tachibana: Take off that stupid black ribbon!




Rei Tachibana: It looks like we're runing out of kid jokes and short jokes, so I say we move on to choosing her nickname.
Himeko Katagiri: Oh! I got it!
Rei Tachibana: Im not looking foward to this, but go ahead, Himeko.
Himeko Katagiri: Rebecco!
Rei Tachibana: That's too weird.
Himeko Katagiri: Then how about Rebecco?
Rei Tachibana: That's what you just said!
Miyako Uehara : In foreign countries, sometimes they shorten names. Like Stephanie becomes Steph and Catherine becomes Cathie, you know?
Kurumi Momose: After all that bitching, she's added to the discussion.




Lord Cat: The cans are warmed by my body heat.
Rebecca Miyamoto: Oh.
Lord Cat: And F.Y.I, I'm God, by the way.




Lord Cat: Oh, and miss, could you please close the door for me?
Rebecca Miyamoto: Screw you, kitty.




All: Hello, Becky!
Becky Miyamoto: C-Commercial!




Becky Miyamoto: Can we go home now, Mesousa?!
Kurumi Momose: Oh, the thingy she's talking to behind the podium, what do you suppose it is? Is it a rabbit?
Rei Tachibana: Yeah, Im pretty sure it's something like that.
Kurumi Momose: [grabbing Mesousa] Do you think it's edible?
Rei Tachibana: There's only one way to find out.




Behoimi: So the long awaited teacher has finally arrived? Come on, let's go check her out, guys! [the students of 1-D are about to leave the classroom]
Old Geezer: You step one foot out that door and I'll be standing by your pillow every night! [the students stop, as they walk in reverse] What a damn bunch of cowards.




Becky Miyamoto: Shut up, you little brats, don't you dare underestimate ME!!! Look, I don't care if you ask any questions, but please use your brain before you open your mouth. For the love of God, try to think of less boring things to ask. Understand? [flips the bird] You lower life forms! [all of the students gasp]




Miyako Uehara: You asked her that on purpose, didn't you?
Rei Tachibana: It was just my way of showing my love.
Miyako Uehara: Oh, you are evil.




Becky Miyamoto: Okay, that's it for today, see ya tomorrow morning bright and early, suckas!
 
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