Duke Nukem Quotations

Duke Nukem is a series of platform and First-person shooter computer games from Apogee Software.

Duke Nukem

Also known as "Duke Nukum"

Forget it metal breath, I'll just kick your butt and still have time to watch Oprah.

Duke Nukem 3D

Duke Nukem 3D (1996)

"Born to be wild!" [after singing Steppenwolfs song 'Born To Be Wild' on the microphone in the 3rd episode of Duke Nukem 3D, Shrapnel City, level 1]
Ah... much better! [after peeing on the toilet]
Blow it out your ass!
Come get some! [reference to Ash's quote from Evil Dead 3]
Damn it!
Damn!
Damn, I hate disco!
Damn, I'm good!
Damn... I'm looking good! [after looking at himself in a mirror]
Damn, those alien bastards are gonna pay for shooting up my ride.
Damn, you're ugly.
Game over!
Get away from her, you bitch! [in reference to Aliens]
Die, you son of a bitch! [in reference to Jaws]
Get back to work, you slacker! [checking out office computer playing duke3d]
Go ahead, make my day. (reference to the phrase "Go ahead, make my day" written by Joseph C. Stinson and spoken by the character Harry Callahan from the 1983 film 'Sudden Impact')
Guess again, freakshow. I'm coming back to town, and the last thing that's gonna go through your mind before you die... is my size- 13 boot!
Groovy! [reference to Ash's quote from Evil Dead 2]
Hail to the king baby! [reference to Ash's quote from Evil Dead 3]
Heh, heh, heh... what a mess!
Hmm, don't have time to play with myself. [Duke examines the Duke Nukem II arcade machine]
Hmm, that's one "Doomed" Space Marine.[seeing a torn corpse of a Space Marine from Doom]
Holy cow!
Holy shit!
I'll rip your head off and shit down your neck. [reference to Sergeant Hartman in Full Metal Jacket]
I'm gonna get medieval on your asses! [reference to Marsellus Wallace in Pulp Fiction]
I'm gonna kick your ass, bitch!
I'm gonna put this smack dab on your ass!
I've got balls of steel. [examining the Duke Nukem pinball machine in an arcade]
I ain't afraid of no quake! [in reference to ID Software's Quake PC Game]
I like a good cigar...and a bad woman...
It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum... and I'm all outta gum. (Predated by "Rowdy" Roddy Piper in They Live who says: I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubble gum. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1jPG_JEyt-M)
It's down to you and me, you one-eyed freak! [when encountering the Emperor]
It's time to abort your whole freaking species! [After defeating the Queen]
Kill them all and let God sort 'em out!
Let's rock!
Let's go surfin' now. Everybody's learning how. Come on and safari with me. [singing Beach Boys' 'Surfin Safari']
Looks like cleanup on aisle four.
Love, exciting and new. [singing 'The Love Boat' by Paul Williams and Charles Fox]
My name is Duke Nukem - and I'm coming to get the rest of you alien bastards! [After defeating the Battlelord]
No way I'm eating this shit!
Nobody steals our chicks... and lives!
This really pisses me off!
That's gonna leave a mark!
Now this is a force to be reckoned with! [after discovering Luke Skywalker's corpse hanging upside down]
Nuke 'em 'till they glow, then shoot 'em in the dark!
See you in Hell!
Shake it, baby!
Shit happens. [after stepping in alien feces]
Staying alive, staying alive, la. [singing Bee Gees 'Staying Alive']
Suck it down!
We meet again, Doctor Jones! [after discovering Indiana Jones corpse hanging]
What are you waitin' for? Christmas? [after the player has been away from keyboard for a while]
What are you? Some bottom-feeding, scum-sucking algae eater?
Who wants some?
Yeah, piece of cake!
Yippie ka-yay, mother[beep]er! [reference to Bruce Willis, in the Die Hard Films]
You guys suck!
You're pissing me off!
You're an inspiration for birth control.
Your face, your ass, what's the difference?
You wanna dance?
My boot, your face; the perfect couple.
Gonna rip you a new one.
Ooh, that's gotta hurt. (says sarcastically after blowing up enemy corpses)
Oh...your ass is grass and I've got the weed-whacker.

Duke Nukem: Time to Kill

Duke Nukem: Time to Kill (1998)

Eat shit and die!
Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your chicks.
Have you seen my rubber...duckie?
Hey! Get your ass out of here, Rubbe, and bring me back my chicks! [to a male stripper]
I'll blow you a new hole!
I'm God's gift to women!
I got no time to bleed! /Reference to Predator/
I love the smell of bacon in the morning /Reference to Apocalypse Now and the smell of the napalm in the morning/
I make this look good. /Reference to Men in Black/
Lara, is that you? [after picking up a pay phone and listening to a moaning babe]/Reference to Tomb Raider'a Lara Croft/
Looks like it's TIME TO KILL!
My home away from home! [in reference to a strip club]
Suck my boomstick [After killing an enemy with a shotgun/ Reference to the Evil Dead series.]
The bigger they are, the harder they bleed!
There's new sheriff in town.
What the hell are you waiting for? Christmas?
You make a great belt
Little pig, Little pig let me in? Or I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll kick your ass in!
Rubba dub dub getta out of the tub.
Mmmm! Who wants bacon with the eggs? /After killing Pig Cops/

Duke Nukem: Zero Hour

Duke Nukem: Zero Hour (1999)

Blow it out your knees!
Don't worry about it, saving chicks is what I'm all about!
Who the hell are you? My evil twin? (Talking to future self)
Now hear me! Aliens have traveled to the past, trying change history. I went back and fought them! But my time machine was destroyed, and now I can no longer chase them through time![…]But remember, if you don't go back and make things right, Earth's history will forever change, and mankind could be wiped out!
Well...so much for my vacation-time.
Chestnuts roasting... as I open fire (In reference to the Christmas carol 'Chestnuts roasting ON an open fire')
Ahhh, smell those traffic fumes. And no damn aliens! Time for some R & R!
What the *bleep* is goin' on here?!
Looks like the crap has hit the fan. (upon arriving at the thrashed Duke Burger)

Duke Nukem: Land of the Babes

Duke Nukem: Land of the Babes (2000)

Well, enough talk then. Come get some! Oh, Silverback, one more thing. I'm gonna enjoy pissin' on your dead body!
Welcome to "Cool's-Ville", Population: ME
I'm your worst nightmare, you uninvited alien scum-sucker! And right now you're all that stands between me and a planet full of babes - so get ready to bend over and kiss your ass goodbye!

Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project

Duke Nukem: Manhattan Project (2002)

Ah, New York! It's my kind of town. If I can kill 'em here...I can kill 'em anywhere! / Reference to Frank Sinatra's song "New York" ("If I can make it there, I'll make it anywhere...")
Babe: "Duke, you're my hero!" Duke: "You must be 18 or older to ride."
Babes, bullets, bombs. Damn - I love this job!
Come on out, Morphix. There's just two ways this can end, and in both of them, you die!
Crouching mutant, hidden pipebomb! (reference to the movie "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon")
Dance for me, baby!
Guns don't kill mutants, I kill mutants.
Half man, half animal, all dead.
Hmm, so there is life after death... (after respawning)
Hmmm... That's gonna leave a mark. (when he blows up enemies)
I always said, if there was a way to go, it'd have something to do with women, whips, and oil...
I am king of the world, baby! (reference to the 1997 film "Titanic")
I could use some new boots. (when Duke encounters a mutant crocodile)
I like big guns, and I cannot lie. (when rocket launcher is selected, reference to Sir Mix-A-Lot's song "Baby Got Back")
I see dead people. (when he blows up enemies, reference to the film The Sixth Sense)
It's a good day to die! (reference to Worf from Star Trek: The Next Generation)
It's my way or... Hell, it's my way! (After blowing up a subway car)
Life is like a box of ammo. (when assult rifle is selected, reference to the film Forrest Gump: "Life is like a box of chocolates...")
Makin'...bacon! (after killing a pig cop)
Mother[beep] keycards!
Someone´s gonna pay for making me find these motherfucking keycards!
No token, no ride! [when he kills a mutant on the subway] (reference to Indiana Jones "Zeppelin Scene")
Rest in pieces! (when he blows up enemies)
Say "hello" to my little friend! (when pipebombs are selected, reference to "Scarface")
So many babes, so little time.
Someone's gonna pay for making me find these friggin' key cards...
Son of a bitch! (after respawning, blowing up enemies, or when soda machines don't work)
Surprise, surprise, I need a keycard.
This is why I have games named after me!
Time for mutation-mutilation! (when GLOPP ray is selected)
Oops, I did it again! (when he blows up enemies, reference to the Britney Spears song)
Time to deliver max pain on the A-Train...now where'd I put that subway token? (A reference to the video game Max Payne)
Time to deworm the Big Apple...
What a pussy! (after killing a fembot)
What am I? A frog? (reference to the game Frogger as Duke tries to run between cars)
Confucius say... DIE!
You talkin' to me? (reference to the movie Taxi Driver)
You're goin' down faster than the XFL!
You are the missing link. Goodbye. (Reference to the game show The Weakest Link)
Your kung-fu's through! (after killing a mutant crocodile)
Now I'm really pissed off! (after respawning)
I hate pigs! (after killing a pig cop)
Squeal like a pig! (when Duke encounters a pig cop)
Hmmm...the other white meat (when Duke encounters a pig cop)
Should've stayed in the swamp! (after killing a mutant crocodile)
Sewer scum! (when Duke encounters a mutant rat)
So much for the rat pack! (after killing a mutant rat)
This'll be a barrel of laughs (when shotgun is selected)
Take that, you dirty rat! (after killing a mutant rat)
This room is bugged (when Duke encounters a mutant roach or fly)
I kill bugs...DEAD! (after killing a mutant roach or fly)
Batteries not included! (after killing a robot/mech)

Duke Nukem Forever

Duke Nukem Forever (Cancelled)

[From trailer 1998 (E3)] I was born to rock the world!

(From teaser trailer released December 19th 2007)

I'm lookin' for some alien toilet to park my bricks... Who's first?

(From The Jace Hall Show, Episode 1 (5/31/08)) Duke's in a bad, bad mood!

Quoternity